Sample Discussion: Dad, why are kids so lonely today?

Then the eyes of both were opened, and they knew that they were naked. And they sewed fig leaves together and made themselves loincloths.

And they heard the sound of the LORD God walking in the garden in the cool of the day, and the man and his wife hid themselves from the presence of the LORD God among the trees of the garden. —Genesis 3:7–8

Do you ever feel lonely? Sometimes we all do. But loneliness can be really hard. Loneliness is such an important issue that the Bible talks about it right from the beginning. 

You’ve probably heard the story of Adam and Eve in the garden of Eden, but did you realize how much it talks about loneliness? First, after God creates Adam, he says that it’s not good for Adam to be alone. Why is that? After God created the world in Genesis 1, God said he would make humans in his image. Actually, he says “Let us make man in our image” (Genesis 1:26). You see, God is three in one—the Father, the Son, and the Holy Spirit—God has always lived in relationship. God is never alone. Being in God’s image means that we reflect who he is, just like you reflect aspects of your dad and mom. One of those aspects of God that we reflect is that we are created to live in relationship with others. That’s one of the reasons being lonely can be so painful—it goes against our very nature.

So, God creates a companion for Adam, a woman named Eve. Adam is overjoyed to meet her, and the two of them are happy together. But, then, they disobey God and sin enters the world. This leads to so many bad things that still cause us pain. One of them is loneliness. You see, though Adam and Eve had found so much joy together, after they sin, they hide from one another. They don’t run away from each other altogether, but they do make clothes for themselves out of fig leaves. That’s a way of hiding aspects of who they are from each other. Now, it’s not wrong for us to wear clothes—God will even give them clothes later in the story—but this desire to hide aspects of who we are from others is a part of what makes people so lonely today. We cover up our true selves with pictures on Instagram that make our lives look better than they truly are. Or we only share with people things that make us look good. We are too afraid to open up honestly with others, and that leaves us lonely.

And then, after they hide from each other, Adam and Eve try to hide from God. They actually think that cowering behind trees will keep God from finding them. Sin also leads us to try to hide from God. We may be ashamed of the things we’ve done. Or we may want to do what we like without worrying what God will think. But, just like Adam and Eve, we can’t actually hide from God. He will find us. 

And that’s a good thing. God doesn’t give up on us. He relentlessly pursues us. Just like your parents won’t give up on you. God, like your parents, wants you to flourish—to enjoy the life that God longs for you to have. That will involve both connecting with God and with others, and having at least some people with whom you can be completely honest about your joys and struggles.

In his pursuit of you, God sent his son, Jesus, to endure the effects of sin, even loneliness, on the cross, so that we would be freed from sin’s power. When he did that, he made a way for us to be forgiven of our sin and find friendship with God. He also created a new community, the church, of people in relationship with God. When we find friendship with God through Jesus, we also get a whole new family of friends in the church (Ephesians 2:19). Though we may all feel lonely sometimes, through Jesus and his church, we never have to be lonely again. As Jesus says, “I am with you always, to the end of the age” (Matthew 28:20).